Thursday 23 August 2012

SayNo2Stalking - Andie Steele-Smith

Hi there

Thanks for stopping by.

This site has been established in conjunction with www.sayno2stalking.com to serve as a cyberstalking and stalking victims resource.

In this site, I have endeavoured to outline for victims of stalking, cyberstalking and harassment, the things that I wish I knew 4 years ago. It is these lessons that have enabled my wife and I to regain our lives and those of our family. 

To be very clear, I do not wish in any way to confuse or replace the great work that the existing anti-stalking charities are undertaking, rather this site is an agglomeration of information that one particular victim found useful in his quest to regain his life.

One of the things that we have learned as victims of a 3+ year campaign of stalking, cyberstalking and harassment is that extracting yourself from the relentless pursuit of an obsessive stalker is incredibly hard to do. Stalkers rely heavily on shock, awe, fear and the power of obsession to disable their prey. Despite this however, it is very often possible to win your life, health, peace and safety back. 

For the victims of stalking and cyberstalking, the odds are unfortunately stacked against you even before the attack or campaign commences. Put bluntly, the stalker or cyberstalker has usually spent years developing the nature, psyche and motivations required to mercilessly stalk their prey; and yet the victim usually has no prior preparation whatsoever. Thus at the outset of a stalking or cyberstalking attack, the victim is the novice, whilst the perpetrator is the master. Research shows that many stalkers and cyberstalkers are repeat offenders, often having multiple victims - thus the perpetrator comes into the campaign with a wealth of knowledge and experience. I can attest from experience - as can many of my friends and family members - that this is at first quite terrifying and disabling.

When an obsessive or psychopathic stalker or cyberstalker invades every aspect of your life - family, business, friendships, faith etc - your freedom and basic human right to live in peace is impacted. The initial impact of an obsessive stalking campaign is extreme and shocking. However that is no accident. The perpetrator of the crime cleverly uses shock, awe and fear - to terrify, disable, disempower, dissociate and isolate his prey or victim. 

From my personal experience, the initial key to fighting back however is knowledge. This site and www.sayno2stalking.com are intended as a resource and knowledge platform. In these two sites I will publish a cross-section of the knowledge that I have obtained, leant upon and developed across the past 4 years. 

KNOWLEDGE + ACTION = EMPOWERMENT


The key for me in developing a plan of attack, was to research and develop a good knowledge base, including of the following areas:
  • The commonality (ie common occurrence) of what the victim is experiencing and suffering from
  • Knowledge of the various types of stalker (cyber, spatial etc)
  • Knowledge of who (where possible) the perpetrator is
  • Knowledge of the law and the criminal justice system (CJS)
  • Knowledge of the common failings of the CJS
  • Knowledge of the psychological make-up of stalkers
  • Knowledge of stalker typology
  • Knowledge of stalker motivations
  • Knowledge of the anti-stalking charities, victims support agencies and professional service providers whom can assist you as a victim
  • Knowledge of the methodologies used by stalkers and cyberstalkers
  • Knowledge of the common impacts of stalking and cyberstalking on its victims
  • Knowledge of the therapeutic survival and recovery methodologies and service providers

After assimilating and understanding this knowledge, the better prepared you are for the fight-back. And ultimately the better prepared you are, the greater your chances of success in defeating the insidious attentions of your stalker, thus transitioning from "victim" to "survivor".


In the brief period since www.sayno2stalking.com was launched I have been contacted by an overwhelming number of victims and survivors who have echoed their encouragement and thanks. It is my sincere hope and prayer that these two sites will assist further victims and ultimately help channel them into the paths of the government agencies, charities and professional advisors whom can in turn best help them to enact a plan of survival, fightback and restoration of life, safety, peace and health. 

Please feel free to make contact either via this site or via this link.



#SayNo2Stalking

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